DISCLAIMER: Faking Daily features fictional content for entertainment purposes only. Do not take any information here as factual or rely on it for any real-world decisions.

Trinamool's 'Bottle-gate' Drama Uncorked: BJP's IT Cell Pours Fuel on the Fire

Faking Daily Bureau/Bangalore- New Delhi's political theatre has outdone itself yet again, delivering a plot twist worthy of a Bollywood potboiler. The Bharatiya Janata Party's digital warriors have unleashed a series of clandestine videos and WhatsApp exchanges that purportedly lay bare the aftermath of an explosive tête-à-tête between Trinamool Congress stalwart Kalyan Banerjee and an enigmatic party colleague. The nation watches, popcorn in hand, as this saga unfolds.

The curtain rose during a session of the Joint Parliamentary Committee on the Waqf Bill. Banerjee, known for her oratorical flourishes, reportedly decided that words were insufficient and introduced a glass water bottle into the discourse—by smashing it and allegedly directing its trajectory towards the committee's chairperson, BJP's Jagdambika Pal. This avant-garde method of debate left Banerjee nursing injuries to her thumb and index finger, necessitating immediate medical attention.

Not to be outdone in the theatrics department, BJP's IT cell head honcho, Amit Malviya, took to the virtual stage. He disseminated a montage of videos and chat transcripts that, according to him, provide an unfiltered glimpse into the TMC's internal dynamics post-bottle episode. Malviya's pièce de résistance was a clip featuring Banerjee expounding on the expansive reach of Waqf properties, suggesting that any locale graced by a namaz inherently becomes Waqf territory. This revelation prompted Malviya to prognosticate a dystopian future where Kolkata's landmarks might be up for grabs.

The TMC's defense strategy was swift and pointed. Party spokesperson Jay Prakash Majumdar dismissed the incident as a minor lapse, attributing Banerjee's spirited response to provocations from BJP's Abhijit Gangopadhyay, whom he labeled as a "person with huge nuisance value." Majumdar emphasized Banerjee's seasoned parliamentary credentials, contrasting them with Gangopadhyay's freshman status.

Banerjee broke her silence, alleging that Gangopadhyay's verbal assaults targeted not just him but extended to her family, crossing all lines of decorum. She questioned the legitimacy of her suspension from the committee, asserting that only the Speaker holds such authority.

The BJP, seizing the moral high ground, petitioned Lok Sabha Speaker Om Birla for stringent action against Banerjee. They characterized her bottle-wielding antics as "unprecedented violence" and called for her suspension pending a thorough investigation. The letter, underscored by signatures from BJP luminaries including Nishikant Dubey and Aparajita Sarangi, painted Banerjee's actions as a blemish on parliamentary decorum.

DISCLAIMER: Everything you just read on FakingDaily.com is about as believable as a Bollywood dance number curing world hunger. We're in the business of making you chuckle, not tricking you (unless you think Shah Rukh Khan can actually defy gravity). If this tickled your funny bone a little less than a feather, well, darling, perhaps satire isn't your cup of chai. Now go forth and spread laughter, not fake news! - FD Staff

Post a Comment

Ads