Faking Daily Bureau/Bangalore- In a groundbreaking revelation that has left chaiwalas and techies alike spilling their cutting chai, Meta's very own Zuker Bhai has announced that the latest AI marvel, Llama 4, is set to replace humans entirely. Yes, you heard it right. The days of human error, emotional outbursts, and, dare we say, 'chai breaks' are numbered.
Llama 4, affectionately dubbed 'The Great Indian Llama' by desi netizens, is not just any AI model. It's an 'omni-model' with 'agentic capabilities,' which, in layman's terms, means it can do everything from making your morning filter coffee to coding the next big app—all without complaining about salary hikes or traffic jams.
According to Zuker Bhai, Meta is pouring a cool $60–$65 billion into this AI venture. That's right, billions with a 'B.' When asked about this extravagant spending, Zuker Bhai reportedly said, "We're planning to invest $60–65B in capex this year while also growing our AI teams significantly, and we have the capital to continue investing in the years ahead."
But what does this mean for the average Joe, or should we say, the average Joshi? Well, for starters, Llama 4 is expected to serve over 1 billion people by 2025. That's more than the entire population of India! Imagine an AI that knows your Aadhaar number, your favorite Bollywood song, and how you like your samosas—crispy, with extra chutney.
However, not everyone is thrilled about this AI takeover. The All India Human Workers Association has expressed concerns. Their spokesperson, Mr. Aam Aadmi, stated, "First, they took our call center jobs, then our IT jobs, and now they want to take our chai-making jobs? Yeh toh hadd ho gayi!" ("Congratulations, we’ve broken the world record for madness!")
On the flip side, tech enthusiasts are ecstatic. One Bengaluru-based startup founder, who prefers to remain anonymous, said, "With Llama 4 handling all the work, we can finally focus on what's important—like attending more startup events and perfecting our elevator pitches."
In a recent demonstration, Llama 4 showcased its prowess by composing a new Bollywood song that instantly went viral. The song, titled "AI Se Tum," has been streamed over a million times on various platforms. Music directors are now contemplating early retirement.
But it's not just the entertainment industry that's feeling the heat. The education sector is also bracing for impact. With Llama 4's ability to provide instant answers to any question, students are questioning the need to attend classes. One college student remarked, "Why should I wake up for an 8 AM lecture when Llama 4 can explain everything in seconds?"
Even the culinary world isn't safe. Llama 4's recipe suggestions have been hailed as revolutionary. From perfecting the art of biryani to innovating fusion dishes like 'Butter Chicken Sushi,' chefs are both amazed and terrified.
However, skeptics argue that while Llama 4 is impressive, it lacks the 'human touch.' Dr. Vidya Prakash, a psychologist, commented, "AI can mimic human behavior, but it can't replicate human emotions. There's a difference between a machine saying 'I understand' and a friend genuinely understanding your feelings."
In response to such concerns, Meta has assured the public that Llama 4 is designed to assist, not replace, humans. A Meta spokesperson stated, "Our goal is to enhance human capabilities, not diminish them. Llama 4 is here to handle mundane tasks, allowing humans to focus on creativity and innovation."